fabulists: (spring)
fable mods 🌿 ([personal profile] fabulists) wrote in [community profile] fablecottage2023-04-09 10:23 pm
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TDM #4

fable test drive meme #4
// away with the fairies
In your land, there may be stories of the Fae taking people away. Perhaps you haven't heard of the Fae at all, or perhaps you are more familiar with them than others. No matter how well acquainted you are with the Fae, everyone around you has experienced the same fate tonight: Being taken by them. Partially, at least. For they did not want to kidnap anyone from their home and take them away from the life they knew. In a small jar of fairy dust, part of your soul was taken in the night and brought to a magical village by the name of Fable.

On arrival, the Fae release you from the jar before waving their magic wands, and materialise this taken little part of you into a brand new you. From here onwards, your new life begins, shared among all sorts of magical creatures. Here, you will be allowed to grow, thrive and enjoy the bounties provided to you by these mysterious and wonderful creatures. In exchange, they ask for a share of the magical fruit that you grow in your garden, donated to their dragon overseer in exchange for rewards. After a briefing on your new life, you understand things as best as you possibly can. Now, it's time to settle into a brand new cottagecore life.

Welcome to Fable.
// arrival
Now that you are a resident of Fable, you have a brand new cottage, a garden, and a few tools to use! There's not an awful lot in your cottage, though: Just a cardboard box, a lamp, a cassette tape and a single bed. Fear not, though! By participating in friendly tasks, your cottage will look great in no time.

Something sparkly catches your attention before you realise it's a message board, advertising an array of tasks for bonus fruit. Did this thing appear out of nowhere just now? That must be the case, since you can swear it wasn't there a second ago. The board may inspire you to go out there and mingle. It seems that the monthly tasks are geared towards friendliness to welcome this new season!
april showers & pretty flowers
// treacherous thunderstorm

Around this time of year, the weather in Fable can certainly get hectic. While magic can only do so much to tidy the remaining fallen leaves off the ground, there's nothing like a doozy of a downpour to really sweep everything fresh and new. With all of the new flowers that have been growing in Fable, a lot of rainwater is certainly needed to give them all a drink. The dragons and storm spirits have been brewing up a torrential downpour scheduled to fall all over Fable and beyond - along with some strong winds. Are you prepared for the occasion?

From cottage to cottage, roof tiles rattle and leaves are swept away. It is advised to not go outside during this storm period, and if you're caught in the rain, to take shelter immediately! If you can't reach your cottage in time, there are other village landmarks to take shelter beneath. The thunder is very loud and the wind is strong enough to knock someone off their feet. It might be best to keep close to people in this weather - going out alone could be very dangerous. And if you're cooped up inside with a friend or a stranger, why not get to know them to pass the time?

It is important to be wary of the lightning. If someone gets struck by lightning, they will not die - but they will experience an injury and a magical feedback loop which swaps their personality! The cure for this problem is rainwater tea - a remedy which is advertised throughout the town's message boards as a precaution for any unlucky residents. The affected person will be lightning charged, causing them to receive an electric shock every time their hands are near water, which will make brewing tea impossible. Someone who has struck will need to rely on another person to brew the tea for them. A lightning-shaped scar will mark the person who got struck wherever they were affected.

After the storm ceases, there may be property damage such as collapsed gates, fallen fences, missing roof tiles and even an injury or two! Oh no! As compensation for enduring such a hearty storm - the realm's overseer, Prism, provides brand new repairing tools to those who had taken damage.
// flowers of kanshi
After enduring such a horrendous downpour, you definitely feel the urge to get out of town. The residents of Fable gossip endlessly about how stunning the cherry blossoms are in Kanshi this time of year, and the fairies practically insist that you go.

Upon arrival, you can see that Kanshi has received quite a beating from the storm. The winds and rain have blown cherry blossom petals all over the place - in the streets, rivers, and they're covering the buildings. You can see all sorts of tiny magical creatures making their best efforts to clean up, part of you wonders why they aren't using magic.

You feel a tap on the shoulder, and realise that it's a tiny sakura dragon sitting perched on you.

"Hi," they say, "I hope it's not too much to ask, but ... could you help us out here?"

You did come here to relax, so you may be a little bit hesitant at first. Still, you'll allow the dragon to continue.

"Kanshi normally has a dusting of petals here and there, but this is just too much for us to deal with on our own. If you help us gather petals, we'll offer you free access to our hot springs and restaurants. We'll even use the petals to craft furniture for you."

That's not a bad suggestion. Besides, it would be difficult to enjoy a trip here with petals covering the place. Once you agree to the dragon's request, you are given a fishing net to catch petals on the ground, in the water and in the air.
// sakura springs
Finally! It's time to relax. The sakura dragons were true to their word - in addition to the furniture gifted in exchange for the petals you collected, you have access to all of Kanshi's most favoured attractions!

There are incredible restaurants with shiba inu chefs ready to tailor to your every desire! The dining can be enjoyed in outdoor cafés surrounded by flowers, evening restaurants - and even an izakaya (alcohol & food bar) with food and drink available all night. It seems that the residents of Kanshi are very grateful for all the effort taken to clean up their home. If you want to spend the night here, even, the owners of the ryokan (traditional inns) will be glad to accommodate any guests. There are many beautiful wonders all across Kanshi, but one of the most renowned attractions are the hot springs. These incredible buildings feature indoor pools, outdoor waterways and rivers to bathe in which rejuvenates and uplifts anyone who steps in these waters. It's no wonder that creatures travel from all over just to bathe in them!

For every thread you write, you will receive cherry blossom furniture for your cottage! Feel free to leave a comment here to redeem these once you've written 5 tags in your thread! Since our TDMs are considered game canon, if you choose to app, these rewards will cross over with you when you join the game!
Let's see what the attractions of Kanshi have in store!

The Flower Cafés are sooooo cute! Situated outside, these charming cafés offer spectacular views of Kanshi's flower fields. All of the food and drinks arrive in incredibly charming pastel colours! (Even the savoury stuff!) Enjoying time in the café while surrounded by all of this pollen will cause a flower to bloom in your hair every time you smile! When they sprout, it's a very ticklish sensation - which might make you smile a lot. This ticklish pollen can be treated with a swim. Good thing there's a hot spring nearby!

The Restaurants have no shortage of incredible food! Whether you would like to order off the set menu, a conveyor belt or destroy all-you-can eat, every option is available. The more food you consume, the more you will feel the urge to open up and talk about yourself. Even things you might not normally be so inclined to tell strangers...!

The Izakaya Bars are the perfect spots for any adults who love good food and good alcohol. There are no innocuous effects from the food and drink ... apart from the house special - cherry plum sake! It is everyone's favourite drink in Kanshi and all-time best seller. Consuming the sake will cause any of the following effects: giggles, excessive compliments, tingly sensations, increased stamina and the urge to overshare your thoughts.

The Hot Springs are beloved by all of Kanshi's locals and beyond. These huge, towering buildings are crafted with wood and feature private indoor pools, outdoor waterfall pools and smaller pools which are connected by streams. In order to allow guests to bathe in peace, the mythological & animal villagers of Kanshi have granted their guests from Fable to have an area all to themselves. They have also provided care packages to the guests! They contain a variety of scented bath salts to choose from. Each salt type has an (undisclosed) effect once in use. The Rose Scented Salts will make someone feel warm, friendly and affectionate. The Vanilla Bean Salts will make someone feel confident and talkative. Their mood will also be enhanced - whether it's a happy kind or melancholic kind. And the Warming Lavender Salts, surprisingly, will give someone the tail and ears of an animal!

over the rainbow
// a rainsplosion

You were likely more than aware of the intense storm that happened earlier. Just when you figure that everything is settled, you are interrupted by a group of frantic fairies flittering through Fable's village.

"Quick! Quick! Come with us! You've gotta see it!"

See what, exactly? Once you have the opportunity, you ask these excitable fae why they're in such a hurry.

"There's gonna be an explosion! A magic explosion!" ... Is that even safe?

"You know the storm? The huge storm? Well - a lot of it was magic, you know! The storm spirits created something magnificent to tidy up winter and blow everything away. And then the dragons and unicorns got involved, and they all started playing in the clouds and had a magic fight! This one cloud is so full of magic - it's going to explode! You've got to come and see it! Nothing bad will happen ... we think! But if it does, we'll fix the problem right up with our magic! Promise!"

Can you really trust the fairies to keep their promise...? But a magical explosion does sound pretty cool. Perhaps against your better judgement, you agree to go.
On the mountainside, you see it - a huge looming storm cloud flickering with rainbow colours and streaks of lightning. There are a few dragons flying nearby, with a heavy layer of anticipation in the air. You can hear laughter from the creatures, which might reassure you that you aren't in any real danger. And then--

ThclouEXPLODEwitfantastiBOOM!

You have to admit - it does look pretty incredible! Just as you take a moment to admire the rainbow explosion, the magical shockwaves blast out and phase through you which causes an immediate effect...! Uh oh?!

Depending on which colour of the magical rainbow blast hits you, a different effect will occur:

Being hit with the colour Red will cause you to kiss the person you see next! Oh, my!

Being hit with the colour Orange will transform you into a merperson! Which is great, except ... you can't see any water around here! Maybe someone can carry you to water.

Being hit with the colour Yellow will give you an animal ears and tail of your choice. So cute! But you also feel the urge to follow the instincts and behaviours of said animal to some degree, too.

Being hit with the colour Green will summon enemies for you to fight! Yikes! From the shadows, monsters manifested out of your worst fears will come to life before trying to attack you - you've been given a weapon to defend yourself, but it would be better if you battled them with another person!

Being hit with the colour Blue will make you spontaneously burst into tears. It seems like nothing can stop you from crying, either - but comfort from another will ease the pain.

Being hit with the colour Purple will cause all of your inner thoughts to hover above your head in a thought bubble. Let's hope you aren't thinking of anything too strange at the moment ...

In a standard fairytale way, all effects end at midnight. Those cheeky fairies didn't keep their promise after all!
Welcome to Fable's fourth TDM!
We're excited to have you here, and hope you enjoy the prompts!
To familiarise yourself with the setting, please take a look at the arrivals & premise page!
We would also appreciate it if you could have a look at the rules as well.
As a general note, the TDMs are considered game canon!
Which means all rewards for fruit & furniture can be used in the game if you apply!

New arrivals have a cottage, a network device, the clothes on their back and a single item from home.
To view the locations, NPCs and more information about the game, please visit our full navigation!

If you have any questions that you have not seen answered in the FAQ, please ask in the FAQ post. Thank you!
admonition: (â—† 017)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 04:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[ In all fairness, Alhaitham never faced a challenge to prove his existence to someone. Honestly, even if he had, he would ignore such nonsense. Most of the time, Kaveh's behavior has little to do with rationality, especially when he's intoxicated. But Alhaitham is aware that he can't pin all of this on alcohol, not with the bits of information Kaveh gave him just a little while ago. ]

Let's get some fresh air first. [ He reaches for Kaveh's hand swiftly and notices the droplet stains. The architect avoids eye contact and makes sure that his locks cover his eyes which could only mean one thing and the stains just prove that. ] Let's go.

[ He tugs him lightly with the intention to lead Kaveh outside. ]

If you still think that I'm not real, then I'll make sure that you understand that you are mistaken soon enough.
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 165)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 05:06 pm (UTC)(link)
( Begrudgingly, Kaveh pulls up his head, with the dampness of his cheeks casting a reflection of the overhead lights to explicitly show that he's crying. Well ... it's not like his life hasn't already been a cascade of terrible events thus far. What's public crying to add on top of that? It's not like it's the first time he's cried around Alhaitham, either, especially in this place.

The blonde man steps to his feet, leaning on his former housemate while he leads him outside. Despite his drunken haze, he's starting to consider the idea that Alhaitham might actually be real after all. This is one hell of an illusion otherwise - it even smells like him. That comforting scent reminds him of their home in Sumeru.
)

...

( Once they're outside, Kaveh breaks the silence with a sniff while he wipes his eyes. ) Sorry about that. About ... me. Being like this. ( He dries his tears on his sleeve. ) It's not the first time you've seen me in this state. And, not long after you did, you went away ... I was scared. I-I was all alone. I mean, not entirely alone ... I had Tighnari, a new friend named Hilda, and Cyno now also ... but you ...

( He makes eye contact, his long dark lashes still lined with tears. )

You don't remember? Being here? What I said to you...? I thought that's why you left. That I frightened you off or something ... after all, a doomed state of existence seems to be all that I'm suited for.
admonition: (â—† 011)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 05:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Save these apologies for a different time, I don't think you have anything to be sorry for.

[ Saying that won't stop Kaveh from beating himself about literally anything—crying in public, being drunk, acting way too emotionally. The list could go on for quite a while, knowing Kaveh. Once Alhaitham gets the information he wanted, it leaves him with the realization that knowing what happened in this world might not be as helpful as he hoped it to be. ]

I don't remember being here or what you said to me. Therefore, I can't and won't apologize for the actions of the other me. [ It might be the exact opposite of what Kaveh wanted to hear, but Alhaitham can't help it. ] Nonetheless, I highly doubt that you were the reason the other me left. It's up to you if you believe what I've just said or not, but...

[ There's a pause as Alhaitham realizes that he should weigh his words carefully. ]

I'm absolutely certain that whatever you do, you couldn't frighten me away.
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 219)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
( He sighs. Those words are reassuring - but Kaveh finds his heart torn two ways. On one hand, he's glad to have Alhaitham back here. He's even more glad to have some form of reassurance that he didn't drive him off. But still ... )

I feel ... selfish. ( Undeserving. ) How is it fair of me to burden you with the job of staying here? You disappeared, and I fell apart. That's a shortcoming of my own, what with my history and all. I just ...

( Kaveh glances away, another tear breaking free once his lashes flutter. )

I don't want to be any more trouble for you. You've already done so much for me already, and I might never be able to repay those debts.
admonition: (â—† 012)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 06:15 pm (UTC)(link)
This is the first time I hear that existing in the same world as you is a job.

[ Alhaitham shakes his head and starts walking without calling in an utter nonsense even though he certainly thinks that. At first, he considered taking Kaveh to a restaurant to make sure that his stomach is full, but the inn might be a better choice—they should have food there as well and it looks like Kaveh desperately needs some peace and rest. ]

It is a shortcoming on your own, I agree. Your worth doesn't depend on my presence or absence at all, Kaveh. Tying it to things outside yourself will only make you more miserable. Not to mention that you keep saying that you're unfair or in debt or whatever else comes to your mind, but have you considered that I might want to be, according to your terminology, troubled?
alcazarzaray: (🦚 174)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 06:30 pm (UTC)(link)
( It stings to hear those words - but Alhaitham is right. This wouldn't be the first time that the Scribe had caused Kaveh to confront his idealistic sense of self in the middle of a crisis. While Kaveh's behaviour is a pattern evolved through trauma, it's not an ideal way for him to live. He understands this.

His posture slackens, with both arms crossing over to fold over his chest.
)

Why would you ever want such a thing? This is hardly your ideal, is it not? You aspire to live a simple, comfortable life, which is barely attainable if you keep a mess like me around. I'm ... not worth that. ( This guy may have had a slight trauma relapse ... just a slight one. )
admonition: (â—† 006)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 07:05 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Alhaitham can tell that Kaveh understands, but there's a long way ahead of him to actually implement this in real life. When the architect shoots him all these questions, he turns around to make sure to look him in the eyes as he answers. ]

In case I ever forget about my idea of an ideal life, I'll make sure to turn to you. What do you think your worth is, Kaveh?

[ This is as blunt as he can get. His intention isn't to hurt Kaveh, but he knows that it might be the final outcome. Whatever happens, he's planning to deal with the consequences one way or another. ]
alcazarzaray: (🦚 222)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
( His lip quivers. )

...

( The urge to break eye contact is almost overwhelming - but he powers through. His voice cracks when he speaks. )

Very little. ( A tear runs down his cheek. He has nothing to add to that - it's exactly how he feels about himself. This messy side of him that only Alhaitham gets to see. )
admonition: (â—† 005)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 07:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Little do you know, then. If you need proof, I'll give it to you as many times as it takes until you realize how wrong your answer is.

[ Alhaitham closes his eyes for a moment and heaves a sigh. Things are much worse than he expected them to be, that's for sure. Kaveh must have been spiraling for quite a while to reach this state, but Alhaitham would like to focus on the present and the future rather than the past he can't change. ]

We're going to the inn. You need to eat and rest.
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 217)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 07:49 pm (UTC)(link)
( It's not that he's dismissing Alhaitham's response by any measure, but he can't help but shake his head once those words land on his ears. The Scribe has proven him wrong before - but Kaveh's self-destructive thoughts are a beast of their own that seem far from being tamed. )

You can give it your best shot.

( Oh, the inn ... right. Kaveh looks dazed and bewildered for a moment, as if the blonde man hadn't even considered what his accommodation may look like tonight. Was he just planning on getting drunk and sleeping in the bar? Perhaps. It wouldn't be the first time he had done such an endeavour. )

I ... guess that's in order, yes. Okay. ( It's better than him refusing the bare minimum levels of self-care from Alhaitham. Arm in arm, Kaveh heads down the cobblestone paths of Kanshi with his former housemate to try and find a place to stay. The streets are lined with soft glowing lanterns, and the faint aroma of flowers can be detected in the damp air. It's definitely nothing like Sumeru, but whether Kaveh realises it or not, he can feel the cracks of his broken heart beginning to mend with Alhaitham here at last. Even though he subconsciously resists acts of self-care by instinct, this is definitely a step in the right direction.

The shiba inu innkeepers give both men a key, before escorting them to their room. There is an onsen, a lounge area, and menus to order food from.
)

Oh, we ... mmm. ( Kaveh pauses, staring at the bed situation. ) We should've specified that we needed separate beds, shouldn't we ... ( Sigh. ) Well, if you're fine with it, then I am too.
admonition: (â—† 013)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-10 08:07 pm (UTC)(link)
[ As convenient it would have been, there is simply no chance Kaveh would be enthusiastic about the idea the way he is now. It doesn't discourage Alhaitham, but he doesn't have much else to say about the matter&mdashthe scribe is definitely going to give it his best shot, though.

The walk to the inn is quite nice, but it makes Alhaitham realize one thing, namely how much he misses Kaveh's cheerful blabbering, even if at times it's just a mask to cover up his struggles. Sometimes, however, it was genuine and at these moments, Kaveh always shone the brightest. There's no need for them to keep talking at all costs, so Alhaitham simply gives up on that until they're in a more private place.

Their lodging is rather impressive, but he's not here to examine the room. In fact, he's more interested in the menu because knowing Kaveh, he should eat something as soon as possible. His eyes are scanning the name of the dishes when the bed situation is mentioned. ]


One bed is enough. [ A beat. ] Make sure to pick someting to eat so we can order. Something more than one soup, too.
alcazarzaray: (🦚 207)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-10 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
( At least they don't have to go through the trouble of finding a new room. Kaveh walks back from the bed area, heading over to the table where Alhaitham is looking at the menu. He's had no appetite for weeks but, to his surprise, he's actually in the mood for something. Having Alhaitham back has already had a tremendous impact on him, whether he realises it or not. )

Very well ... something more than one soup it is. ( Kaveh picks the menu up to take a better look. ) To be honest, I am actually feeling quite hungry. I'll definitely be after a bit more than soup.

( His appetite has certainly awoken tonight. Taking a pencil and paper, the architect writes his order down. He's after some edamame beans, miso soup with tofu and vegetable yaki udon. Kaveh then slides the note across the table to Alhaitham. )

If I may ask a favour, do you think you could you order for me? I hope you don't mind if I bathe before the food arrives. I feel disgusting.

( At least there's some self awareness happening here ... he's not unwashed or dirty by any measure, but he reeks of alcohol and looks bedraggled. A cleanse in the water is exactly what his soul needs. )
admonition: (â—† 004)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 09:24 am (UTC)(link)
Go ahead. I'll order and wait here if you need me.

[ There's probably no need to let Kaveh know where exactly he's going to be while he's bathing, yet Alhaitham does it anyway. If he were asked to admit that he's doing it for Kaveh's comfort, he would probably remain silent, though.

As soon as the scribe is alone and done with ordering the food, it's inevitable to think about what Kaveh told him about the other Alhaitham. How come he didn't notice anything if a part of his soul had been in this bizarre land, even if for a short while? For someone who does self-reflection on a regular basis, Alhaitham knows he would have noticed something. The same goes for Kaveh, actually—they're living together and Alhaitham is watching the architect very carefully, yet he hasn't realized that something is off. Well, even now he doesn't believe that something is missing.

Although he can tell that Kaveh is doing a bit better, he doesn't feel too relieved as he might relapse anytime. Walking on eggshells around the architect won't help, but causing him unnecessary pain will be even worse. Alhaitham sighs deeply and rests his back against the seat. It would be nice to take a nap, but he'd rather not leave Kaveh to his own devices, even if he's acting more reasonably now.

At the very least, the food is served just before the other man finishes his bath. Alhaitham is snacking on his own portion of edamame. ]
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 218)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 11:27 am (UTC)(link)
( And with the food order sorted, Kaveh makes his way into the bathroom area to check out the onsen. It's a pleasant looking bath - surrounded by rocks with a mist of steam rising from the water. He can't say he's ever seen something so inviting. The blonde man unclips the red pins from his hair, using his fingers to tease his locks free before he sheds his clothes. After gathering soap, shampoo and conditioner from the side, he sits beneath one of the waterfall flower streams and washes every inch of his body. The suds carry a pleasant aroma of cherry blossoms, and with each passing moment, Kaveh can feel himself relaxing.

He's so glad that Alhaitham is here again. Part of him can't believe how badly he spiralled without him, but this is just the way of his trauma. Kaveh sighs, and once he's finished cleaning himself, he steps over to the onsen and gently lowers his body into the water. It soothes him right down to his bones. A few vials catch his eye on the side, and he notices that they contain bath salts. The rose scented salts sound particularly alluring, so he adds them to the water and relaxes.

When Kaveh hears the door to their suite open, he can only assume that the food has arrived. He steps out of the water and dries himself off with a towel, with his blonde locks twisting out into adorable curls from where the dampness clings to his hair. He doesn't have a change of clothes or underwear so rather than wearing the outfit he arrived in, he takes one of the complimentary white robes and puts it on.

Looking much more refreshed, the architect steps back into the room, sitting opposite Alhaitham on the table. Oh, the food looks so good ... it's almost as if this moment has taught him just how little he's been eating recently. Alhaitham may notice the way that Kaveh's collar bones protrude more than usual, but the blonde man doesn't even hesitate to pick up a pair of chopsticks and start eating, practically devouring the edamame beans while intermittently taking spoonfuls of the miso soup.
)

Mmmmm ... ( He hums, and swallows. ) This is so good. Thank you.
admonition: (â—† 011)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 11:43 am (UTC)(link)
It's not like I made the food in the first place. [ Alhaitham puts the bowl away and reaches for his own miso soup to drink it. ] No need to thank me.

[ It might have been a more general thank you, as far as he's concerned, yet that doesn't change anything—it just doesn't feel like he's doing anything that requires gratitude, really. The silence lingers for a little while before he speaks up again: ]

After I arrived, I thought that living alone was going to feel strange. Convenient, but strange. I suppose it's only natural that I got used to your presence.

[ It's way more than that, even if Alhaitham isn't saying it out loud. ]
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 200)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 11:59 am (UTC)(link)
Still, you ordered it. I'm grateful for that.

( It's true that Alhaitham didn't make the food before them, but Kaveh will always feel inclined to use his manners. The silence lingers shortly afterwards, and the blonde man glances up to gaze at the Scribe once his statement commands his attention. With a deep breath, Kaveh returns his focus to their meal. )

I understand. And ... when I told you I said embarrassing nonsense to you earlier, that's more or less how it went down. ( He swallows. ) I don't know what came over me, it might've been something in my drink, but I couldn't stop myself from telling you how much I preferred your company to living on my own. It was ... so mortifying.

We haven't always seen eye to eye on many things, and this wouldn't be the first time I made such an embarrassing blunder in front of you. But still ... ( The pain comes from how vulnerable he felt. How much it ties with his past. ) I just ... really convinced myself that I frightened you away. That you decided you had enough and were done with me. ( And since Alhaitham knows Kaveh's history, he'll know how the blonde man feels about prospective abandonment. ) I might not have dealt with it in the healthiest way, either ... but I want to get better.
admonition: (â—† 014)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 12:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Do you still feel that way? Or was it momentary because of the drink?

[ Kaveh might need more subtle approach, but getting that from Alhaitham is a rare occurence. It's not like he's not aware that Kaveh might not want to answer the question now, after all. Still, the scribe believes that they need to talk it all out and move on. ]

You're right, that wouldn't be the first time. However... I don't think you're capable of scaring me off. There's a high possibility that you just clung to the worst possible outcome that would allow you to put yourself down. What's done is done, though.
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 167)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 12:20 pm (UTC)(link)
( Kaveh winces a little with hesitation, but softens his posture once Alhaitham finishes speaking - physically showing that his reluctance to tell the truth has disappeared following the other man's reassurance. The fear of Alhaitham leaving is still a thorn in his side, but he will try and listen to the rationality breaking through. It's not as if the Scribe would give anything less. )

... I do. ( And, honestly - being told that he isn't capable of scaring Alhaitham off reassures him more than he realises. There's even a small blush glowing on his cheeks. ) And about me thinking up the worst possible outcome, you're probably right. No - not probably right, definitely right ... ( Sigh. ) It's like my brain just sabotages me into thinking I deserve to suffer. That I deserve pain. That of course I don't deserve to have the one person I care about more than everyone else here. How suffering and loneliness destined for me.

( Saying all of this out loud feels so gross. But, Alhaitham is the only person Kaveh can trust with these vulnerable trauma-centric feelings of his. )

But it's not a good way to live. Not for you, for me ... or for anyone. I have ways to go, but I don't want to believe that loneliness and pain are all I deserve in life. I want to challenge these thoughts ... I'm so tired of them. ( He closes his eyes. ) I've lived with them for so long.
admonition: (â—† 017)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 12:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Even if Kaveh considers it gross, Alhaitham just accepts it as the truth without labelling it. It's neither good, bad nor embarrassing for him. This is how the architect perceives himself and whether he decides to change that or not it's all up to Kaveh himself. It doesn't mean that he has to tackle all of this on his own. ]

I can challenge them for you, too. With logic and... possibly some other means.

[ Alhaitham looks away, his eyebrows burrowed as if he surprised himself with saying that out loud. ]

But there's always a risk we might get separated. We're in a world I don't understand quite well yet. Just... don't blame yourself for whatever happens. There are things beyond your control.
alcazarzaray: © rosebursts ( dnt ) (🦚 216)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 12:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Other means? ( He questions, after swallowing the last of his meal. There's not a crumb left. )

Mm ... I understand. ( It's not a pleasant thought, but, still. He will believe that Alhaitham is telling the truth in that Kaveh is not the cause for his current or any future disappearances. ) I won't blame myself if things go awry. Or believe that it is what I deserve if they do.

I ... hope you'll stick around, though. I've really missed you.
admonition: (â—† 002)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 12:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Other means.

[ The verbal explanation might feel unsatisfactory until Alhaitham rests his hand on top of Kaveh's. It's a simple gesture that won't convey everything he would like to say, but it's definitely a start. ]

It could go both ways. But I hope that wherever you go I will be there, too. Even if it's not the current me.
alcazarzaray: © ostian (🦚 141)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 12:51 pm (UTC)(link)
( --Whoa. )

...

( Kaveh's eyes widen - which marks the most expressive facial expression that he's made in months. His jaw falls slack, an inaudible sound falling out of him while a brilliant red colour scorches his cheeks. That hand contact definitely isn't what he was expecting. Not that he wants to get his hopes up or anything, but-- )

A-Alhaitham? ( Gently, he bends his own fingers and holds the other man's hand. Is this allowed...? ) A-Are you ... do you...? ( Like me? He means to say. )
admonition: (â—† 016)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 01:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I am. I do.

[ Technically, he hasn't said anything yet. It's laughable that the scribe himself can't find the words to express himself. Perhaps it should bother Alhaitham a little more, but he's long accepted that's just the way he is. Untangling all these feelings and conveying them properly might take a while, but it seems like it's high time he's started that project. ]

That's why you can't frighten me away.
alcazarzaray: © prepull (🦚 162)

[personal profile] alcazarzaray 2023-04-11 01:08 pm (UTC)(link)
( There are no words to articulate how he feels right now. In a way, Kaveh has known for months that his feelings for the Scribe are more than platonic. But what could he do with feelings like this, once Alhaitham left this place? How could he ever hope to unpack them? In his absence, Kaveh felt almost widowed in a way - with the intense pain mirroring the pain his mother felt when his father died. It awakened a part of him that he wasn't ready to confront - but when would he ever be?

Even now, he can't quite get there. And yet ... the blonde man finds himself shuffling closer on the floor, seating himself closer to where Alhaitham is situated. Soon enough, there is a breath's worth of distance between them, and Kaveh reaches a hand out to stroke his face.
)

Tell me this is real. ( His hand trembles. ) That this isn't a magical illusion. You're here. You mean this.
admonition: (â—† 008)

[personal profile] admonition 2023-04-11 01:15 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Alhaitham's eyes remain fixed on Kaveh while he moves closer. Shortly, the corners of his lips curl up in a small smile, too. ]

Are you really going to be satisfied if I just tell you? [ The scribe's hand rests on top of trembling hand on his cheek. ] Because I won't.

[ At this point, he can't assess why it is easier to do things rather than say them out loud, but this is a new territory for Alhaitham, all things considered. One he's quite eager to explore, in fact, if him closing the distance and having their lips meet is anything to go by. He puts some pressure into that kiss, but doesn't draw it out for too long. ]

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